INTRODUCTION:
It’s a new year, which means new you! It’s time to set your New Year’s Resolution, such as travel, get a higher education, switch careers, write a book, you name it. But how exactly will you achieve this?
For many people, goal-setting and having a New Year’s Resolution is easy. It’s achieving these goals that is hard. And for most of these folks, the resolution may need to carry over to the next year.
In this article, I want to talk about resilience and how to achieve your goals this year. I’m giving you 7 methods that will help you become resilient, so you can check off your New Year’s Resolution.
HOW TO BE RESILIENT:
Watch the Video here:
- Positive Self-Talk
Studies have shown that the way you talk to yourself, even about yourself, really affects how you feel about yourself and how you approach the world. If you talk positively to yourself, you’ll have a positive outlook on life; if you talk negatively to yourself, you’ll have a negative outlook.
Consider how you talk to yourself when you first wake up in the morning. Do you moan and groan and say you hate work? Or do you pull yourself out of bed and say “I got this; I can do this! It’s a new day”?
If you practice the first, I challenge you to start doing the latter. You’ll be surprised by how this mindset can really boost your mood.
- Set goals
This one is obvious because of the title: how to be resilient and achieve your goals. So, you’ll need goals. Your goals can be anything, but I want you to think about what you truly want to accomplish this year. These goals should not be easily obtainable, yet be something you can gradually complete.
Have you been wanting to take your health into your own hands? Have you been wanting to change careers but it comes with gaining a higher education? How about writing a novel and getting it published? All of these goals, and more, take time and perseverance to accomplish, but that’s why you have this whole year to get it started and finished.
Speaking of start and finish, if your goal is to write your book, I have a Novel Writing Kit to help you. Just click here.
- Try Something New
One of the scariest things in life is uncertainty. Uncertainty always comes with trying something new. However, the moment you act on that novel thing, your brain actually tracks it as familiar because you’ve done it before, and it’s no longer scary.
Think about meeting up with friends at a restaurant you’ve never been to before. You have to map it out, time your commute, sit in a new setting, and try a new menu. Once you’ve done it, it’s no longer scary the next time you all meet up there again.
The reason you want to try something new is to gain personal growth. Believe it or not, one’s own lack of self-growth actually creates insecurities, self-doubt, shame, negative self-talk, and a whole host of things that hinders you from becoming the person you want to be this year. And you don’t want that, hence you’re watching this video, so try something new.
- Have a Support Group
As much as some of us were reared to think we’re lone wolves and meant to traverse this planet alone, we’re not. We are social beings who need connections. And the best connections you can form is with those who support you.
Build a support group who will uplift you and your dreams, keep you accountable, and celebrate your wins. Be picky about who you allow into your inner circle this year because you are the average of the five people around you. This circle could be family members, trusted friends, or a totally new group of people, such as a church group, a single mom’s or dad’s group, or a writing group, to name a few.
- Set Boundaries
Boundaries are an invisible line drawn between you and those around you, in order to protect your time, energy, and emotions. In order to accomplish your goals this year you’ll need to set boundaries around your goals and things you want to do this year. The lack of boundaries allows others to take advantage of you, and before you know it you’ve given all of yourself to others and their commitments meanwhile your own goals have been neglected.
However, what does setting boundaries look like? It could be turning down a few friend-outings so you can study, saying no to the in-laws’s dropping by whenever they want to because you don’t want to play host and just want a nice quiet house with just your tiny family; it may also mean cutting off a toxic relationship with a friend or family member because they never have anything nice to say to you, and this chips away at your self-confidence.
Again, boundaries help preserve your peace so you can get your own stuff done. And honestly, the moment I decided that I didn’t want to be involved in family drama anymore, by cutting off my own parents and in-laws, I was able to invest my own emotions and time into writing, and I was able to write and publish 4 books last year. See the description below for more details.
- Learn from the Past
The only way to move forward into the new year with hope and resilience is to look at your past and accept it. Maybe you did some stupid things last year that you’re not proud of. Well, you can’t undo them, so accept that you did them, will never repeat the mistakes, and move on.
This is when letting go becomes crucial. Letting go is hard, but you can do it. Let go of the things you cannot change and learn from events that have occurred and the people who have hurt you. Reflect on this, identify if you may have played a part or continued in patterns you no longer want to proceed in, consider what changes you’d like to see and do, and go do it. Use your past to create a better future for yourself.
- Stop Seeking External Validation
It feels great having others notice us and praise us, but if you constantly seek validation, the people around you will eventually grow tired of you and walk away. Then your sources of validation become zero and you’ll feel empty once again.
So instead of seeking out people to either boast about your achievements with, or complain about how life didn’t go your way because of excuses a,b,c,d, start giving yourself the validation you need. And this validation goes back to number 1 on this list–by using positive self talk.
When you achieve something, be the first person to praise yourself and celebrate your win. Tell yourself, “Great job! I knew you could do it!” And treat yourself to something nice, like ice cream or relaxation time bc you deserve it.
The more you accept your achievements, the less external validation you’ll need to feel good about yourself.
CONCLUSION:
There you have it, 7 methods to help you become resilient and achieve your goals this year. If your New Year’s Resolution is to become a better version of yourself, try something new, set boundaries, and start speaking positively to yourself.
Comment below with which method you will definitely use or if there’s a technique I’m missing that you know can help others.
Thank you for reading!